I am going to start keeping track of what is going on because my mind is spinning. Maybe writing about it will help. Although I doubt it, pushing forward with optimistic intentions regardless.
Two nights ago I had a panic attack because I sneezed and after watching the news for several hours had lowered myself to the level of thinking that maybe this was the end for me – maybe I was next to go to the hospital and die. Of course I sneeze almost every day, but now, it is something to think about, and think about, and obsess about. I know others are anxious like me because of this panic-driven news cycle. I am sick of my mind, but I can fix that. I can turn off the TV. I can try to meditate. I can do about a million other things than being anxious about my doom.
In Aspen, the first known cases were around March 12th. A progression of “suggestions” and mandates and orders have us operating in the unknown like most communities in the United States. The country is navigating waters she has never seen before.
Fears include the take-over of our government by nefarious forces that want to keep us on our knees. The end of capitalism as we know it. The sad suckling sounds of people eager to feed off the government teat (and trust me, I think that is completely warranted right now – just scary). How are we going to fix this mess?
Contemplations (I guess that is not a word? Too bad) include: what is wealth, what is money, what is value, and how can we change our banking system and financial institutions into something more sustainable?
I want truth. I really think the TRUTH is that we really don’t know what this virus is, where it came from exactly (certainly China, but man-made for bio-warfare, a mistake leak, or something different altogether). We don’t know how exactly it transmits (it is probably from a variety of ways, and there is really no use debating them, it would be better to investigate them all). We don’t know how long it will last. As a matter of fact, I think it may be here to stay, as most viruses are.